I want to talk about the power of confidence.
Confidence is everything. And it’s something I struggle with regularly.
Without confidence, you're going nowhere.
I don't know if you can really teach confidence, however I do believe that you can take steps to exercise and develop confidence like any other muscle and ultimately strengthen the confidence trait (at least I hope that’s the case or I’m shit out luck…)
In a society of instant gratification, perfect pictures, social media backdrops, competitive community, business, schools, etc. it becomes increasingly more challenging to have the confidence to not constantly be looking around, comparing, assuming, judging and competing against anything and everything that you see around you that looks better than whatever it is you’ve currently got.
We’re made to feel that we don't look good enough, don't have enough money, aren’t doing as much as we can to get ahead, to get to our destination faster, become stronger, faster, healthier, more successful, have the best kids, the ideal life, whatever it may be.
And by all means don’t miss out or say no to anything along the way or you may not be invited back.
You'd think this would get easier in Midlife; I'd argue it gets harder.
I work in a business where I get told no a lot.
Get put off, blown off, paid lip service, let down gently, rejected outright…Sales is like that.
It’s a humbling and constant ebb and flow of high’s and lows. It’s taken me a while to keep myself from getting too high on the high’s or too low when the low’s creep in. To find a semblance of balance and maintain self-confidence when you’re not immediately, accepted, validated or compensated for the value you provide (or are trying to illustrate that you provide so that they buy from you, retain you, appreciate you, want you.)
Just as I was writing this I got invited to join a friend in an online course. The message bubble popped up, I broke focus, reactively opened the text, clicked the link, thus doing exactly what I know I shouldn’t have done (If you’re wondering what I should’ve done the answer is NOT open the text, stay focused on finishing this article and THEN open and respond) but I digress…The point is about confidence, so let me get back to that. Here’s what jumped out at me as soon as I clicked that link:
"But above all else, Digital Course Academy™️ will give you the confidence to finally make the lucrative leap to “course business owner.”
The operative word in this quote is “Confidence”. That’s what should be bolded. Without confidence you’re not making that leap to whatever it is you want to do.
If I could choose one superpower to have, it would be confidence.
When you believe in yourself and have confidence, you’re happy. And when you’re happy, you’re confident.
There’s a direct correlation.
So what do you do to develop the skill?
How do you develop confidence?
I break it down to a series of little wins.
Creating a purpose, a process, and a pay-off to each of your days.
I find that I need these little victories that I can control to help keep me going.
Did I get up on time?
Dress for success?
Look like a winner?
Make five new phone calls to new prospects regardless of what the outcome may be?
The confidence build is in making the call, not the response.
The muscle gets stronger by working it. By overcoming the fear and insecurity of not making the call in the first place because we're scared of what we're going to hear on the other line and just putting ourselves out there in a vulnerable, yet purposeful way.
What are you doing to create little wins for yourself each day and build confidence?
Did you make a list of three things you were going to accomplish and were you able to do that?
Or are you suffering from paralysis by analysis, and you can't get out of your own way? So much to do, you don't know where to start. So many things cluttering your mind that your confidence wanes?
Are you paying attention to how your mood and your mindset change when you experience a little victory?
If you are anything like me and struggle with confidence it’s not a lost cause.
There’s a lot you can do.
I’m a big believer that the help for pretty much anything you need is out there.
You can find it, work it and make improvements on any aspect of your life.
You just have to want it and be willing to put in the work.
Are you putting yourself in places, situations and around people to create opportunity?
Positioning yourself to be given an opportunity to compete and to win?
Finding a coach or mentor?
Have an accountability partner?
Since there’s always someone out there who can say it better than I (Ironic, lack of self confidence statement...), here’s a link to an article I found particularly helpful on boosting self-confidence.
Hope it helps you -